When you’re a parent of a baby with reflux disease, much of the time is spent holding your baby is while they scream and thrash about in pain. You don’t really have those moments of soft cuddles, enjoying their newborn smell or how peaceful they look snuggled in your arms. Those blissful parenting moments. Even when your child is asleep in your arms, which is usually the only way you can get them to sleep (no self-settling with a reflux baby!), their sleep is often interrupted by painful happenings in their insides. Even if they don’t wake, you see their little face scrunch up in pain and their legs being pulled up in an effort to pass the pain. Our little man regularly screams, whimpers and cries in his sleep. It’s heartbreaking. This pain used to always wake him but he’s getting better at sleeping through it, often now just crying and writhing around in his sleep. But that’s not what this post is about. Amongst all this, there are moments that are beautiful and after my last post, I thought I’d share them.
Our little man has the biggest grin and he readily breaks into peals of laughter when you blow raspberries on his tummy or when his sister hugs him. It is such a stark contrast to the screams and such a welcome sound. His inexplicable happy nature is also why we found it so difficult to get doctors to take us seriously. But these smiles and the wonderful sound of his laughter brings such happiness in our house. When we are holding him screaming at 2am, it his smiling face we keep in our mind’s eye so we remember his true personality. So we remember our happy, little boy who really would rather be laughing.
The other precious moment is common to many mums. That moment when your baby nods off on your shoulder, usually after the night feed. At that moment, looking at your peaceful baby who is so relaxed and content – all is right with the world and everything is wonderful.